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by blakemusPrime (BlakemusPrime)



Series: Avery & Jace Chronicles [1]
Category: Angst - Fandom, Gay - Fandom, beach - Fandom, break ups - Fandom, feels - Fandom, gay pride - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-01
Updated: 2013-03-31
Packaged: 2017-12-07 03:36:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/743742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlakemusPrime/pseuds/blakemusPrime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The soap opera that lives in my head.  This is probably a shotty first attempt at doing a snippet of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home

**Home.**

 

 The angry music gushed from the speakers as I turned down the long road to home.  Three Days Grace, I Hate Everything About You.  It was fitting, accentuating my riled up mood perfectly.  Six hours by yourself in a car gives you a lot of time to think about everything that is wrong in your life.

Where did I even start with that rabbit hole?  What was wrong with me?  By the time I turned on to West Fort Morgan road, the only thing that kept me from slipping into a depressed coma was the deafening beat of the music.  The sun was beating down furiously.  It was a hot day, sweltering, and just the way I liked it.  I rolled down the windows and let the sea salt-tinged air flood the interior, the immediate sensory memory causing me to lose interest in the music so I quickly punched the button to kill the radio. 

August had been my favorite time of year.  _Had been_ being the operative words.  It was the time of year that the tourist season began to slow down, the heat being too much for many of the northerners.

_His laughter swept over me like the tide, pulling me out into everything that was Jace.  My love, my home, my heart.  I can’t even remember what we were talking about that made him laugh so, all I remember now is the crinkles that prickled at the edges of his eyes as he did so.  He walked up to me and slid his arms around my waist, taking his time and caressing my sides as he did so.  The sudden outburst had me turning my head at him.  I remember looking into his eyes as my arms wound around him._

_“What is-“ I began before he shook his head at me._

_“Don’t speak.  Let me just look at you, take you in.  Remember everything about you right now, perfectly.”  Jace’s voice had been smooth and steady.  I sucked in a breath to begin another protest, but he squeezed me into him, stopping me again.  I remember the way he caused me to smile then, how my whole being poured into the happiness he caused me.  The light that splintered off the lagoon would get caught in his eyes every once in a while, igniting them in blue fire.  The sight of it would nearly make me weak in the knees._

_“Hmm.”  He had cooed at me, bringing his hand up to stroke through my hair.  He closed the gap after that, putting his lips on mine.  It was not a hurried kiss, nor a deeply passionate one.  It was the kiss that I’ll never forget.  Jace’s lips told me what he couldn’t put into words.  He loved me then.  He adored me.  And he lied to me.  With that kiss, I thought he would love me forever._

I slammed the door with more force than was necessary.  I hated reliving the past.  That was one of the sharper memories in my arsenal.  But I was back, again.  I would have to toughen up if I was going to make it through this.  I came around to the back of the Pathfinder and popped the hatch.  The grass had not been kept and had returned to its wild state, long and swaying in the wind.  My steps were chosen carefully as I made my way up to the steps, avoiding the dreaded sawgrass as carefully as was possible.

The steps did not creak and still held their original pristineness.  The place was only a little over a year old, after all.  The storm shutters were still sealed tight as I gazed up at the expanse of the house from the first platform.  It had been my dream house: my palace on stilts.  Well, it was far from a palace…  It was however everything I wanted, down to the last cabinet door knob.  He had made sure of it, taking extreme care in making sure everything I desired was implemented.  Those things would haunt me now.

_“What are you doing here?”  Jennifer threw her mail down on the counter as she berated me.  I looked up from the TV screen in momentary shock._

_“I’m playing Halo, what does it look like I’m doing?”  My look had been incredulous, confused._

_She stormed around the counter and snatched the controller from my hands.  “No.  I mean what are you doing here… In my house, and not in yours?”  She raised a challenging eyebrow at me._

_I sat up on the couch and looked out the window.  “You know why…”_

_“Ughhh” she huffed at me in her signature display of frustration.  She threw the controller against the entertainment center before she stomped out of my view.  “You’ve got two more weeks here, then you have to get out…”  her tone was all business as she poked around in the fridge, no doubt hunting for a banana.  I stood up with a start._

_“Two weeks?!  What do you mean I have two weeks?”  My shock was turning to horror.  “Dad stole you a spot.  The Fort Morgan Road manager is stepping down and he’s reserved the position for you.  You’re gonna be big kahuna, PIC.”  She peeled her banana and ate it nonchalantly, staring me down all the same._

_“I dunno..” I began but she cut me off._

_“It’s time for you to go home, Avery.  To the house you built.  To the house you’re still paying for.  To the roots you’ve started…”  Her grey eyes bore into mine, bearing the mantle of once-superior gaze.  I knew she was right.  It was time to do something.  Either sell the house and move on, or go back and do it differently._

_I knew my look was pitiful, but she gave me tough love.  “One month before you start.  Two weeks before you’re out of my house.”  With that she turned and walked out, leaving me standing awkwardly in the middle of the living room._

The key slid into the lock as easily as it ever had.  I stood there, the weight of my pack and everything else in my life pulling down on my shoulders.  Finally, after eons I turned the key and swung the door open.  The sunlight streamed in through the shutters’ cracks, illuminating the dancing dust into blazing specks.  Another eon passed before I hesitantly stepped over the threshold, another razor sharp memory cutting me as I did so.

The pack slid down my shoulder until it thudded abrasively against the hardwood.  Slowly I reached behind me and shut the door, leaning against it as I tilted my head back and shut my eyes and let out a long breath. 

Move.  Don’t think.  Just do.

I became alive, bending and grabbing the pack and heading to the bedroom.  I chucked it on the bed before I methodically moved through all the spaces of the house, checking for anything amiss.  It was meticulous.  Nothing out of place. 

That meant he had been here.  I didn’t know when… or how long ago.  Long enough ago at least for the dust to settle over the surfaces.

The fridge was bare, as were most of the cabinets.  He had cleaned them out…  He knew neither of us would be back for a long time…  The weight of being here again, seeing the house bare and empty, un lived in and so empty of ‘us’ bared its teeth at me.  Weakness clawed into me as I braced against the counter, my fingers curling around the countertop edges for support.

I looked up at the ceiling, blinking frantically.  “No.  No more.  No more.”  I willed them to stay behind my eyes, the traitorous tears.  I launched off the counter, bent on keeping myself busy enough to not think. 

I started with the clothes in the dresser.  They had been there for half a year, untouched and unwashed.  The stench of stagnation would be heavy on them.  I carefully avoided his drawers, not yet ready to see if he had left as suddenly as I had.  I was happy to see a bottle of laundry detergent remained in the wash room and that my preemptive attempts to have the utilities reinstated paid off.  The water ran into the machine, mixing and churning the soap up into suds.  As soon as that task was under way I brought out the dust mop, gliding it over the floors.  Then came the dusting of the furniture.  Hours passed as I worked, clearing away the evidence of vacancy in a whirlwind of determination.

When I folded my last pair of socks, the realization that I was done hit me.  Everything I could have done to keep my mind focused was completed.  I stowed the freshly washed garments away and sat tentatively on the edge of the bed.  I got up and walked through the house again as my arms wound around themselves, cradled close to my chest.  I found myself in the kitchen standing in front of the wine cooler.

The fire pit crackled softly as I sat in the chair sideways, feet dangling over one arm, my head propped up on the other.   An airplane cut across my vision of the stars, the spectacle evoking the words of B.o.B. and Hallie Williams’ song.  All of it became comical to me at that moment.  Everything and nothing in particular all at once was a joke.  Laughter bubbled up from my chest and spilled from my lips in a childish manner.

“I thought you’d be here,” I spat out between gasps of breath and laughter, “I really, really thought you’d be here!”  My laughter pounded in my ears, forced they air out of me so hard that tears rolled down the sides of my face.

“But I am…” 

My laughter stopped completely.  I reached down and fished up the wine bottle I thought I had been sipping from, but the aural sensory memory I had just endured made me question if I had guzzled it instead.  The bottle wasn’t half empty. 

I sat it back down and lifted my eyes to the stars again.  “Now I’m hearing things...” 

“Avery.”

My heart stopped.  My head snapped to the side, catching sight of him as the fire light glinted off him in patches.  I was on my feet and facing him without thinking.  The warmth of the August night and the fire popping behind me did nothing to stem the ice running through my veins.  It was like talking to a ghost.

I felt my head start moving, shaking.  “Jace?”  It was a question.  Why are you here?  Why didn’t you call?  Where have you been?  I saw him, watched him begin to move toward me.  He put his hands up, showing he meant no threat.

It was a strange concept for me to try and ponder why he would make such a gesture.  My face must have prompted the action.  He was so close now… close enough for me to reach out and touch.  The wind blew, stirring the fire and blowing his scent across me.

His hand lowered, slipped into his pocket and balled into a fist before he brought it back up.  He brought it up to level with my eyesight and twitched his fingers so that the prize in his palm would fall and dangle from its chain.

The light of the fire slid across its circular feature, making my breath hitch again.

“I remember,” he took a step closer as my eyes widened.  “I remember what it… what it means.”

I didn’t move.  I couldn’t.  Everything this place was had been Jace to me.  The only thing I hadn’t expected to be here when I got back was the real thing.  Him.  Jace.  I had to be dreaming… being here must have been too much emotional stress causing an outlet in the form of a sensory dream.

I took a step back from him.  “No!” he cried, moving his feet too quickly as he fell before me.

“Jace!”  I was on my knees, running my hand under his chin to turn his face up to mine before I could comprehend what I was actually doing.  The prickle of his stubble grated across my hand.  Tangible.  He was real.  Not a memory.  Not a dream.

I shook my head at him, sadness and desperation sweeping through me.  “What are you doing here, Jason?”  Tears streaked down his face, hot against my hand when he finally looked up at me.  “Avery, please.  Please…”  His hand came up and closed over mine, the sensation making me ache.  I took at and pulled him up.  My eyes trailed over the chain that dangled off the fingers that held on to mine.  At the end swung my wedding ring.

_You can give this back to me when you remember what it means…_

I looked up to find his blue eyes blazing, tears spilling over the brims of his eye lids.  “Shhh, shhh”  I brought my hands up to swipe at the drops and his hands snaked around my wrists.

“Avery…” he whispered.  I couldn’t stand it anymore.  I fought my hands free of his and immediately encircled him fiercely.  I cradled his head in one hand and held him close with the other.  It was the first time I was able to breath in 6 months.  Half a year I had gone without air, waiting, holding my breath.  His strong arms crushed me into him, tightening.

Suddenly he pulled back, his head shaking furiously.  “I was stupid.  So stupid.”  His hands were fumbling with the chain then, unclasping it and letting the ring slide of it and into his hand.  He turned it over and over between his fingers as he looked down at it.  “It means I’m yours…” he looked up at me, his eyes clear and defined.  “It means that I’m a part of you.”  I was watching him the whole time, never letting my eyes leave his face as he talked to me.  I felt him slide the ring back onto my finger, the weight of it familiar and warm.

“It means I can’t live without you, Avery.  You’re my forever.  My heart.”

I tilted his head up just enough to get at his lips.  I was whole again, my other half comeback.   I kissed him like he had me that day we laughed over nothing. 

My fingers worked between his, grasping them, pulling him as a backed up.  “Come on.  Let’s go home…”


End file.
